For those out there taking some precious time out of their lives to read our 1st ever blog, I thought that I’d at least make it humorous. Take a look below for some basic airline humor:

Airlines to charge by the pound: chapter two

What to expect next from the airlines? Try this: *

• No more seating on flights under 500 miles. “Passengers will have a rail to hold on to if turbulence occurs. “The airline figures the absence of seats will save $9 million in fuel costs a month,” says one airline.

If you liked this one….

• In another airplane weight reduction plan, United Airlines plans to limit its beer selections to lite beer only and play only light music. “We want to be known more as the lightweights of the industry to stretch how far planes can go,” one vice president says.

• Continental will start making customers weigh in when they buy tickets, selling seating by the pound. Anyone weighing in over 150 pays an extra $10 for each pound. “You buy food by the pound and trucks have to weigh in on highways, so why not be fair about airline tickets and have passengers pay according to their weight”” one airline spokesman said.

• Jet Blue plans to save gas by keeping its planes on the runway and not taxiing up to terminals. Passengers unwilling to walk over from the terminal to the plane, warming up to take off, will have to pay a $25 shuttle fee for riding out on a golf cart.

* This is all the facetious future projections of writer David Maril in Enterprisenews.com….or it is?

Report by David Wilkening